It’s end of year, which means trying to get my life back into focus. As an example, over this past Christmas holiday, I spent some time getting our new home in order. Interspersed with all the yuletide merriment, I decided to get medieval on all the unpacked boxes and disorganized clutter that had accumulated over the past six months.
The psychic rewards of this end of year cleaning blowout have been great…not only do I know where things are, I found a lot of items I had been searching for recently, including some past issues of my favorite magazines. Last night, with a glass of shiraz in hand and the girls in bed, I sat with the September 2006 issue of Fast Company which happens to be focused on customer service (it’s the one with Lewis Black looking like he’s in the first stages of trying to pass a kidney stone).
Inside the issue is an article on Danny Meyer, a successful New York restaurateur, who believes his winning edge comes down to hospitality. Big deal, right? We might expect a restaurant, as well as a hotel, spa, or even theme park to focus on hospitality. But, take a minute to fully consider Danny’s concept of hospitality:
Virtually nothing else is as important as how one is made to feel in any transaction. Hospitality exists when you believe the other person is on your side.
Danny encourages us to elevate the idea of a transaction beyond the usual impersonal financial payment for a product or service. All that typically gets us on the corporate side is a headache where the customer demands ever-increasing levels of service because they’ve handed over their hard-earned money. And who can blame the customer anyway? Many companies have done their very best to betray their customers’ trust by focusing only on the business’ end of that transaction (read: bottom-line profits). In the end, this narrow view of the transaction simply devolves into the all too-familiar customer/corporation antagonism.
Instead, what would happen if we think of the transaction as a binding force for a relationship? How would our business change if we acknowledged that a transaction is not only a financial exchange, but also an exchange of feelings, hopes, and dreams? What if instead of sitting across from our customers at the table, we chose to sit on the same side? A fella isn’t just buying a new silk shirt, he’s buying an image that makes him feel more attractive. A group of friends aren’t just eating dinner, they’re paying for an experience that accentuates their time together. A non-profit organization isn’t purchasing for a new piece of software, they’re buying a tool that will help them be more successful at delivering on their mission. There’s so much more to the customer’s side of the transaction, but it’s up to the business to learn what it is and make the attempt to fulfill it (fully bearing in mind that this ideal isn’t always possible).
As you begin plotting out business goals for 2007, consider the impact of sitting on the same side of the table as your customers. If you have a disgruntled customer or client, ask what it would take for them to believe that you are on their side.
What are you doing today to create an active spirit of hospitality?
Fantastic article.
To be frank, i have been doing this naturally with my customers. I had found out that they were more open minded and clearer and seemingly more comfortable to pass on a idea or a request or so.
But recently, when a friend of mine and me, went out to have dinner, we sat on opposite ends of the table. This was something that i used to do since i was kid. This way, i felt that i could see and interact with the person by directly looking at his face when i looked up. The other way, when we sit side by side, concentration seems to be completely on the food, which would seem rather awkward. My opinion.
So we were having dinner and my friend surprised me with a statement; “Best friends sit side by side while eating”.
So my questions are; Is it true? Considering this social interaction, is it? Isnt it just a personal or psychological opinion, which we try to copy into our daily lifes? Arent we supposed to accept the situation in the manner with which we are more, usually, comfortable with?
Looking forward to a reply because this has been small bother. We have to make both ends happy, right?
And again, fantastic post.
Thanks.
Ath007, for me the whole notion of sitting on the same side of the table is largely metaphorical (though I can see the physical nature of it, too). I always think of those scenes of two people negotiating a divorce or other sort of issue. They sit on opposite sides with a table acting as barrier in the middle. It keeps them separated and distanced when a closer connection is what’s truly needed. And in my experience, we can fall prey to doing this with our customers – keep them just out of reach as a way to defend ourselves (rather like a suit of armor). However, what’s needed today are closer connections and relationships, authenticity and guilelessness. It sounds like you do practice the metaphorical notion of meeting on the same side of the table.
Here’s the part of your question that’s taken me a bit off-guard: I almost always sit on the opposite side of my wife or friend when eating. I almost think its a learned behavior. Look at other couples and more often than not, they’re sitting across from each other undoubtedly for the reasons you mention above.
But what could be the harm of sitting next to a friend, spouse, partner, (or even a business colleague)? The physical structure would then best mirror the metaphorical idea and solidify the connection between you and the other person. I think I’ll try this the next time I’m out in a restaurant and observe what happens.
Thanks so much for your comment, perspective, and opinion of my post.