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Focusing On What We Are Rather Than What We Are Not (My Confession)

Last night, I was paid a visit from my blogging gremlin who goes by the name of “You’ve-Been-Doing-This-For-How-Long-And-You’re-Still-Not-Semifamous” though I prefer call him Boris (as in Boris Badenov). He entered quietly through the back door and whispered very persuasively in my ear about all the things I’m not and all the things that the Alchemy of Soulful Work blog is not and all the things that Bailey WorkPlay is not. This dark little fiend can be extremely effective in sucking the joy and purpose from my work. As you can imagine he’s not a very welcome visitor but always manages to pop up and hang around longer than necessary.

Fortunately, I had some help from my friends on Twitter who helped me crank up the light and usher his black evil soul out the door (thank you tweeps!).

Once Boris and his joy-sucking presence was gone, I went in search of some help to at least address the still-lingering blogging doubts. When I need blog help, one of my favorite sources of inspiration and a good old kick in the pants is Darren Rowse and his Problogger blog. And once again, he came through for me with flying colors with a terrific and well-timed post called What You Say Is What You Are - The Problem of Blogger Inferiority Complex.

The three keys Darren listed are:

It’s that first bullet that really hit close to home for me. It’s built around the question: Are You Focusing More Upon What You’re Not than What You Are as a Blogger? Wow! I’m not sure I was prepared for the truth behind that question but the continuous learner in me recognizes that I’ve allowed myself to get pulled into a way of thinking that is focused more on deficiencies than strengths, failings rather than gifts. If this sounds familiar to you too, don’t worry…we have company (read the comments to both of Darren’s blogposts).

So, let’s figure this one out together. Let’s aim to get reacquainted with our greater self. Let’s commit to creating great work and a life where our passions burn bright. Let’s move forward in the knowledge that we’re never in this alone. Let’s start a dialogue and share what we need to be spectacular in who we are and what we do.

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6 comments for “Focusing On What We Are Rather Than What We Are Not (My Confession)”

  1. Ah Chris. When I saw your tweet I resisted the urge to respond right away confident that you would write more for us here! In fact, if you check I am pretty sure I saved it w/a star there… And that is but the first reason I don’t think micro-blogging (fun and carefree as it can be) could ever replace our blogs in our hearts.

    I do believe that we who blog all go through this roller-coaster; if we say differently, we only lie to ourselves. Sometimes I even suspect that the very successful who have gone the ad-$ route, wonder if they did it the most satisfying way or just plain lucked out. Could they do it the truly soulful writer’s way, attracting their legions of raving fans strictly on the potency and magnetism of their muse, one freely and authentically published?

    I think the best advice I have heard is to blog for yourself so the like-minded you may be meant to commune with will surely discover you, —as will the new friends who were meant to challenge you. My Natasha can be a pain in the okole too (she is laughing in the background at this very moment as I write and glare at her with my own evil eye…) but it seems to be sage advice. If not, well, our kids will at least be able to Google clues on why we did some of the things we did, as we had the audacity to grow up a little bit more in their generation too!

    Aloha hugs my soulful lion, your mane is looking particularly handsome these days :) Rosa

    Posted by Rosa Say | May 13, 2008, 5:53 pm
  2. Oh Rosa, you always seem to know exactly what to say and I love you dearly for that. You know, the good thing about Boris and Natasha is they weren’t too bright…always getting outwitted by a moose and squirrel. So we have that going for us, eh? It doesn’t stop them from plotting and scheming against us though.

    Thanks for the constant encouragement and friendship. You’ve been with me since the beginning and it’s your kindness and wisdom that’s seen me through my own evolution - with Alchemy and all my other life pursuits. You have my deepest appreciation.

    Posted by Chris Bailey | May 13, 2008, 8:24 pm
  3. Hey Chris,

    I can’t even remember where I picked up the link to start subscribing to your feed. In fact, I don’t even really know who you are. But there your feed is in my reader, and whenever you post, it appears. And I enjoy your writing. I found some good take-away messages in the May 6 post about hiring. Your messages may only impact upon my life for a few fleeting moments or minutes - but surely, that’s better than having no impact at all. You have 31 subscribers according to my reader. That’s cool. I have none. That’s cool too. I enjoy writing, regardless of my readership (or lack thereof). And that makes me happy. Is that not enough? :D

    Cheers mate, enjoy your day.

    Posted by Andrew McMillen | May 13, 2008, 10:46 pm
  4. Andrew, however you originally came upon my blog and work I’m glad it resonates with you. (And I think at least based on your music tastes that we have some things in common.)

    The truth is that there are times when low (or at least low by my standards) readership and comments does weigh on me. Just writing for the enjoyment of it isn’t enough…I want to be loved for it. And here’s another truth that I’m equally certain of: there are folks who do love my writing and work but I’m greedy and want more.

    Yet rather than wallow in self-pity I’m back to creatively thinking about how to grow my blog and my Bailey WorkPlay practice. And maybe that’s the personal experience lesson I can share with you and others - keep playing around and finding what works. There’s definitely more to come.

    Hey, thanks again for not only reading but adding your comment here. Much appreciated.

    Posted by Chris Bailey | May 14, 2008, 6:30 am
  5. Okay, Chris, I’ll bite. Why do you blog? No, Really. No matter what reason people give, I’d say most are journaling. We all have messages that are begging to come out and, in what ever way, be shared. I worry about getting caught up so much about how many people are following me, reading my blog, because I know it’ll just be disappointing.
    What’s always been more meaningful is *who* is following, and what kind of response I can get back from them about what I’m thinking or doing, and the little dialogs that get started from there. The fewer number friendships have by far outweighed having volumes of visitors who are just doing a drive-by.

    So, what you have here, is actually quite meaningful, Chris. It’s like art - - you could focus on having tons of people see it. But art is less about what something just looks like; it’s true strength is in how accurately it conveys its maker’s message and passion. Art that can move someone emotionally, or motivate someone to action is truly priceless and timeless.

    True, the artist may have died penniless and unknown, which gets back to your original funk? Yeah, needing to support yourself on art or blogging is something else. Do it for the greater good and trust that the message will get out and bring people together and bring more like-minded people to like-minded blogs, like yours.

    Posted by Wendee Lee | May 14, 2008, 8:10 am
  6. Wendee, I’m printing this out and saving it for the times when Boris sneaks back in because even though I know what you say is true about who reads is more important than how many reads, I’ll still fall prey to the urge of mass notoriety. Self-knowledge can be a double-edged sword at times.

    But what you, Andrew, and Rosa say is a welcome and cheering reminder that even though at times I can’t immediately experience the impact of my blogging work, I know it’s being felt nonetheless. It’s the feedback you’re providing that makes me feel good.

    Thanks so much!

    Posted by Chris Bailey | May 14, 2008, 11:39 am

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