Tag Archives: Communication

Can I Be Honest With You?

by on March 29, 2006 in Business, Work

When was the last time you uttered this phrase? I guess I’ve been semi-consciously tossing it around a lot lately as a preface for saying something candid. But what’s really behind asking if you can give someone the “truth?”

In the course of a conversation with a volunteer whom I greatly respect, I took a pause, launched into the titular phrase here, and started to give my thinking on a current situation involving some delicate issues. I was surprised when he stopped me and asked me to think about what I just said. “Huh?,” was my reply. He responded, “Why did you feel the need to ask me if you could be honest? Honest as opposed to what? A lie? A half-truth?” He was being somewhat facetious, but he was clearly helping me better understand how the casual use of language can shape the larger conversation.

So, why would we begin a conversation or preface a statement with the question, “Can I be honest with you?” Maybe it’s to soften a verbal blow that’s coming. Or perhaps its an acknowledgement that it’s hard to offer frank thoughts to the other individual. We all bring different assumptions about how an opinion might land for the person at the other end. Get curious about those assumptions and whether they are truly helpful in building a more meaningful relationship.

Coaching comes in all shapes and from surprising directions. And the best coaching comes from well-founded relationships that don’t necessarily come from a manager or originate within the organization. Being authentic and vulnerable and asking for help from customers, members, and vendors opens up a whole new world of possible learning.

Accepting Constructive Criticism Is Always Hip

by on July 20, 2005 in Business, Work

Sue at Face2Face has been challenged to give her blog a title transformation. What I dig is how it all came about. She, like me, finds the use of Xtreme in ASAE’s Annual Conference title Xtremely tired and unhip (actually, it all reminds me of that old Simpson’s episode where they try to hip up Itchy and Scratchy by introducing Poochie; not so good idea then, definitely not so good idea now).

Well, a humble reader submitted that Sue’s use of the ’2′ in her blog title was just as old. The really neat part is that she agrees and has risen to the challenge to find something new. She’s opening up the floor to suggestions.

It all just reminded me of the beauty of the blog and the potential for our associations and businesses. All it took was one person to suggest a change to set the wheels in motion. As leaders, can we be open to any and all comments (even those that strike us as xtremely negative…sorry) from our custo/members and consider making changes?